What is really going on here?

navimae @ 2008-12-03T06:25:00

2008-12-03T11:34:10Z

Best dream last night.
I was on my way HOME (the real one)
We played a game
forget to scan me.
Meat and flesh so grotesque

It was good to see you again.

navimae @ 2008-12-02T14:33:00

2008-12-02T19:34:26Z

I got it!

Am I a door?
Am I a key?

its not is it a door or key

I am door-key

Bwahahahahah! I crack my self up

random

2008-12-01T22:13:45Z

Maybe that is what my problem is here….

America is a Cancer (no not the disease- although similar-) It is a Cancer in astrological terms and I am a Gemini.

--------------------------------------------------------

What fools are we to not believe in everyting and nothing?
What fools are we not?
What is the degree that I say stop?
What degree is it that will make you stop?
d
e
a
t
h
Hate for you do do that to me. Try to explaine that one.

-------------------------------------------------------

The White Sage smellls good.

navimae @ 2008-12-01T17:03:00

2008-12-01T22:05:32Z

"There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line."
- Oscar Levant

door and key

2008-11-24T20:09:13Z

I opend the door with out the key?

or Im looking through the widow of the door looking for the key?

hummmmm....

I have the key but opend the door and shut it again?

Do you want the key? Can you find the door?

I am the door with the key in it but not turned?

The door is broken?

I am the door seeing each side?

I am the key?

Your are the key?

You are the door?

I lost all barriers, fear=door. free=key

I am a ghost that doesnt even need a key or door.
fuck that, should I come over and knock on your door and scare you?

BOO! bwahahahahah!!!

d-

2008-11-23T14:04:19Z

Still here. Grinding my teeth.
Holding it in.
This
is
not

its my culture

Sophie is here now she says I pooped
gotta run.

.

2008-11-22T17:20:01Z

I am fake

navimae @ 2008-11-22T07:53:00

2008-11-22T13:19:06Z

Im pretty sure no one reads this journal and if any one does its very few. Thanks and I Apoligize if you actually do read this.
I am going thrugh one of my "issues" again and thinking and typeing seems to help me sort things out as not to go too crazy - my spelling and grammar sucks (yeah Im a high school drop out so what... )(Im in RN school now <I have no effing clue why>). I may be on here a little bit more than normal.

My idenity is not incognito so if this comes back to haunt me wooptie freaken doo. (phraseof the week it seems)

So next year is the 27 and and in 3 from then would be the 12 and 30 so = 9 and of course 9 because Mr. Telsa says 3 and thats the majick number right. 2 is too human and one is the lonelyest number you will ever do. But what does it all mean?

NOTHING
[is](something)

Sophie is 2 and is starting to studer, not studder really but echo.... card dadadada. Loge-n n n n n .I wonder if she hears echos?

More and more people are taking the stick out of their butts but gaining some sort of new probe. Is ignorance really bliss? I guess everyting has its pros and cons

I have a lot more to think (Not like I dont think some of this same old shit over and over again anyway)
We will see you later.

help me .... fuck!

2008-11-21T11:35:39Z

Its pulling again, telling me what need to do. I cant even tell if its a want or need.

I AM FUCKING INSANE.

Its all in my head. You better come before its too late. Where the hell are you anyway? Im about to create a split personality. Hold me back before I do it. The urge, not to, is far less. I have no urge to stop it. Ita a matter of time. No regrets, no worries. My head is swimmng, I need to feed my addiction or I want to feed IT> . FUCK!

I cant even begin to tell you what Im talking about. YOU WILL JUDGE ME.

I AM FUCKING INSANE! I can control it.... I think

thinks to my self... If I know Im insane then the insane dont now they are so im not so its real?

Why do we die?

2008-10-31T12:26:03Z

Why do we die?

Idea #1:

SciFi Quantum stuff:

Inside every creature there is an infinite number of living conscience universes. Living similar to our planet/universe. They are all working to move “forward” in their illusion of time. Creating ways to leave their home and travel far seeking enlightenment and other things to relate to so that they can understand “the meaning of life”.

While living in their self absorbed enlightenment masturbation they forget about keeping their home stable, it falls apart. In a tiny microscopic sort of way, then chain reacts due to more seekers, it turns out the body falls apart and dies. Not only is it happing in you it is happening to someone else in an infinite numbers of way.

I thought of this while driving early this morning. It sounded alot better inside my head than here.

Just saw on the news where this guy started talking about death and the 3 stages. 1, body dies, 2, ground reuses the body, 3, no one speaks your name ever again, Does that help decide who becomes a zombie and who doesnt?

Moral of the story is to quit seeking and just KNOW-

You know, you just don’t know you know.

Know that you know and you will.

The Battle Ship EP 1

2008-09-30T13:21:12Z

They wanted to make a movie so we did.

Pride

2008-09-30T12:53:16Z

3.7 Pride (Latin, superbia)

In Dante's Divine Comedy, the penitent were forced to walk with stone slabs bearing down on their backs in order to induce feelings of humility

I dont want to go that far.

Why do people say "take PRIDE in your work" and "Proud Parent" and "be proud of who you are"?

What ever you do dont do it. It seems like a good idea and you feel good about your slef. Soon you will starve for attention and do more to get it. It will be an addiction.

addiction

Life is an addiction

Everyting you do you have to do in moderation.

Food

Eat too much you will get fat and die. (of course other things come along with that)

Air

Water

Learn to live with your addiction.

Whatever

Thus suicide was deemed as the ultimate, albeit tragic, expression of wrath directed inwardly, a final rejection of God's gifts.

Use "Gods" gifts in moderation.

Sloth (Latin, acedia)... of America. Not quite, but close. They just work to work so they can make money to survive the addicton to greed they envy thoese who have big TVs and Vacations.... in turn they need Pride in their work to be good at what they do. You dont see that sin around much any more.

and Lust but not least

Wrath (Latin, ira) Where the fuck is all the gas?!?!!? Go on and Fuck your gas tank hole and set your dick on fire!

What would you do for a klondike bar?

2008-09-05T23:17:39Z

What would you do ..

loving someone you cant trust?

Stupid shit man, stupid shit.

Tree Man Video

2008-08-11T12:27:56Z

HR 5843

2008-07-30T19:02:01Z

Google: HR 5843

*jinkies whats that?*

navimae @ 2008-07-29T14:57:00

2008-07-29T18:57:51Z

Do Vampires poop or pee?

google earth is creepy

2008-07-28T16:51:19Z

Google Earth creeps me out. It has a areal veiw of my house... thats ok but it also has a side view of it as your driving past it. What if I decided to run around my house naked that day google took that picture!?!?!

navimae @ 2008-07-26T17:18:00

2008-07-26T21:22:58Z

It must have been the party at chucky cheese.... holy crap!!

Adults have crazy parties? Talk about kids parties!

I think I need a whole week off to relax after that. Thank god for grandma helping out with the baby. All and all I think Logan had a good 6th birthday and thats all I can afford for the rest of the freaken year. Now off to go drink at the Adults party...

cheeze yall later

?

2008-07-25T23:39:39Z

Something is a foot

Ohio Trip

2008-07-15T15:29:11Z

I made a music video of our trip to Ohio. It was a boreing ride up there and back but pretty fun there. I got the music from my friend Jennifer and this other guy makes we stopped to visit her on the way home.

navimae @ 2008-06-27T09:32:00

2008-06-27T13:33:33Z

I smoked 3 last night. I got flipped out. Im going to go pick up Logan tommrow. Get him the hell away from all the crap and back home. I super excited to have my boy back!

Movie

2008-06-26T14:12:40Z

Got this from a friend. I just like the part 1

http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com/main.htm

Its a slow start but makes some cool points. Its about 2 hours so its Long.

Day 5

2008-06-25T14:48:37Z

I skipped the other days, trying to keep my self busy. Im not too bad off.
My smell is comming back full force. Smokers smell bad. Man, I must have smelled bad too. So is my taste. I guess my weight gain will follow or not. its whatever.

Cold turkey is not that bad. I just become a bitch so leave me alone unless you want me to say something nasty.

I think I will yoga then jog tonight.

I can read your mind.

2008-06-24T23:12:01Z

Okie dokie, So time is an "illusion" everything happens at the same time. Sooo.... when I tap into that information and "exist at the same time" as everything else then I can "read your mind"

How do I know? I tried it. Its hard to jump in even thou you are already in but.......

If you can exist simultaneously.... (True story)

then I said... "pick a number 1-10."
He thinks of a number...
I say "Ok you got it?"
he says "yes"
Im existing.... I say "7" with not doubt in my mind
He says "holy shit"

It worked then and and after too because its the same time....
then I said... "pick a number 1-10."
She thinks of a number...
I say "Ok you got it?"
she says "yes"
Im existing.... I say "5" with not doubt in my mind
She says "how the hell did you do that?"

Bwahahahahah!

It works it really works.... Try it, Im not shitting you.

I know, I know its just a 1-10 thing but keep it going and open it works for anything like Rumpelstiltskin/Rasputin.

day one

2008-06-20T22:57:29Z

I am going to try to stop smoking cold turkey. I had my last one this morning and havent bought a pack today. I did bum one around 2pm and that was it. I dont think Im going to make it. I keep thinking about smoking. My head hurts. I really want one. I think the head ache is from withdrawl from the chemicals. The thinking is just from habit. Breaking an old habit is hard. Especially when you live with someone who smokes all the fucken time and stress is high. I somewhat enjoy the torture.